Okay, so this is one that I wasn't going to post, but decided that I've nothing to lose ;) and everything to gain. After all chances are meant to be taken.
I don't know why
You take the late night train
Behind those striking blue eyes
I'm sure theres a story
I turn ever so slightly to glance at you
You send back a lopsided grin
And I wonder why your always alone
Months go by, these glances we'll share
Until I build up the courage
To inquire your name
But before I can you disappear
I'm upset, but not with you
Rather its because I wasn't able to ask
So I'll take your old spot
On this midnight train
To remind myself
That chances are meant to be taken
And so day after day I'll wait for you
But is become to much of a disappointment
I've decided today will be the last day
And I'm almost in tears was the train starts
Then suddenly I feel a tap on my shoulder
I turn and am met by your blue eyes
Ever so sweetly you smile and say
"Hello, my name is Jason."
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How could you hesitate! This is one of my favorites again. *need to stop saying that* I love the diversity of this one, there's just the right amount of vocab, and honestly, can I suggest one thing? I think the poem should be called, "Take Chances," considering the poem is more based on that, than the 'Glance' it's self, ya know? I love the pictures I get from the imagery, like "the late night train," it makes the piece more mysterious! I really enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing! And remember Brend, (just a reminder, 'cause I know u know) The biggest and best artisans from any field, are the ones that take big risks... YES, sometimes they fall, but when people question their talents worth, they are reminded soon again how incredible and unique they truly are!
ReplyDeleteI thought of Trevor's song when I saw the title (lol). I've been in this situation a lot. I like how you put incorporated the "fairy tale" concept at the end. I'm proud of you (:
ReplyDeleteYa know I thought about Trev's song when I titled it. lol. But it seemed to fit, "glances"
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